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Mrs. Dykowski... cherishes the benefit of true friendships

I was talking recently to a couple of my go-to l a d i e s ab o u t housekeeping and the tasks that we don’t get around to.

We confessed to one another our struggles and agreed that none of us is good at staying on top of the laundry.

I can’t tell you how relieved I was to hear these ladies I admire say that their clothes get left in the washer overnight(s) or never seem to get started at all.

When I feel overwhelmed or like I’m not capable of being everything I need to be, these ladies are my counselors.

They are honest with me when it’s time to buckle down and stop whining.

They tell me it’s OK not to get around to every single thing on my to-do list and just focus on my family. In fact, sometimes they advise me to burn the to-do list altogether.

They encourage me, listen to me and check on me when I don’t seem like myself.

They are true friends.

Most of them are not exactly near my age, but that makes our relationship better because we have different needs and perspectives.

I help them with trivial things like navigating their Facebook page, and they enjoy hearing about my kids.

I benefit from their experience and ability to see that the things I’m overthinking are short-lived.

They give me hope of a bright tomorrow.

I love having mom friends near my age, but I find that we have a hard time being present for each other when we’re each being pulled in a million directions. We commiserate that none of us have any idea what we’re doing, which is great. But of course, that doesn’t really help us actually figure it out.

Our society ingrains in us that we only really need close relationships with people our own age, but that lie is robbing us of something really special.

Don’t buy it, Dublin.

Don’t assume that that struggling young mom doesn’t want your help just because you’re decades older than her. Ask her about her life. Then just listen.

Moms, don’t be afraid to ask that older lady to have coffee at your house one morning and ask her the hard questions about naptime, and discipline and marriage. Then just listen.

At the end of the day we’re all just people doing our best and wanting to connect to each other.

Sarah Dykowski is the wife of Publisher Scott Dykowski. She can be reached at composing@dublincitizen.com .

Dublin Citizen

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